Tag Archives: parenting

My Graduate 

In the month of May 22 years ago, I had a 2 year old son, was pregnant with my second child, turned 22 years old and was newly widowed.  During that month, I also learned my second child would be a girl…the last gift for my son and I from my husband.  I was SO excited to know my husbands legacy would live on in both his son and daughter.  Kailee-Lane McKenna LeBrun was born in August, and was the most perfect baby girl I had ever seen! 

Throughout the past 21+ years, I have found myself looking at my daughter and wondering how it is possible for her to be so much like someone she’s never physically met.  She’s stubborn like her mother, but sweet like her father.  She has the self determination and Drive like her father.  She has a shyness about her just like him, but a mean streak like her mother if you cross her! She is a perfect mix of the two people who wanted her, but never dreamed only one of us would ever get the joy of raising her. 

From the time she’s been old enough to talk, she’s always been interested in medical shows.  I would catch her watching Trauma Center on the T.V. as a toddler. She would dress up as a doctor, using socks as gloves, and perform “medical acts” on our poor unsuspecting pets! She once told me she wanted to be a doctor when she was about 8.  When I told her she needed to work on her math grade so she can calculate medications,  she said “That’s the nurses job!” 😂 So it was no surprise after high school when she decided to go to college to be a nurse.        She began her classes locally and was on her way to getting her degree. 

Reason #1 why she was motivated. Having to live in a household with your new baby sister screaming all of the time, helps you realize the importance of staying in school and getting your degree before juggling kids AND a family!

Shortly after she started classes, we found out my husband was stationed in Washington.  So after a few months finishing classes, she moved to Washington.  During that time, she decided to change her major from nursing to become a paramedic.  Her reasoning….she didn’t know if she could handle the day to day relationship you build with patients because she would get too attached.  This is where my heart burst with pride. How could you not be so proud of the maturity of a young lady knowing she is so caring and loving, she wouldn’t be able to leave work at work?  To know at such a young age what you are and are not capable of, is showing maturity beyond her years! So that’s just what she did! 
After a semester in Washington, she moved to North Carolina, enrolled in college, and has been there ever since.  I have missed my baby girl, but it’s been so nice knowing I’ve raised such an independent, hard working, self-sufficient young lady. She has made new friends, worked as a waitress, and worked hard to finish her classes on time! Through all the struggles, the tears, the late nights, the moving boxes, and stupid boys, she did it!! 

So tomorrow morning, bright and early, we will pack up the car and head to North Carolina to see my baby girl! Friday night we will attend her Paramedic pinning, and Saturday we will attend her college graduation.  She has 2 sets of grandparents, her godparents, her cousins, and all of her siblings coming to see her take the first steps into her future! And I would bet there is a very special angel looking down with the biggest smile on his face! 

Congratulations to the most gorgeous, loving, caring, funny, Paramedic I know! I love you sweet cheeks! 😘😘

When Anxiety Waits

Saturday, February 25, 2017.

What a beautiful Florida day to wake up to! The sun was shining brightly, and the temperature was perfect. We had a busy day planned. I had to go to Target with Makailyn to get my nephew a birthday present and then we could go home to get ready for the Luke Bryan Concert!  My husband had an MRI scheduled, so Everleigh was going to spend the day at the party with Granny and Bubba(Pit).  After we made sure she was taken care of, it was go time! Three girls on a mission to get all beautified for the upcoming evening! But deep down, it was there…I felt it looming, and pushed it back down as much as I could!  

We rode with my cousin and her daughter to the concert. We had to get there early because we all had PIT tickets, which meant we would be waiting in line for hours before we could enter the event!  Walking up to the familiar building, I took it in stride.  Everything seemed to be ok. My cousin had dropped us off at the corner to go find our spot in the line while she parked.  I walked around with the three girls for a few minutes and there didn’t seem to be much of a crowd, much less a line. So far, so good. We stopped by to get a drink and headed around to the side of he building where we found both the line, and my cousin. The girls went on a hunt for food and brought back fries without ketchup from one of the food trucks out front!! Who eats French fries without at LEAST ketchup! So my cousin and I left them to hold our spot in line and find me some ketchup! 

When we came to the front of the building, walking towards the food truck, it hit me…the heavy weight in my chest.  I tried to take a deep breath, but that damn elephant was too heavy to get in a full, deep, oxygenated breath. I tried again. No luck. I scanned the crowd for any familiar faces and the elephant sat up a little…just enough to get some clarity. I GOT TO GET AWAY FROM THE FRONT! My cousin was waiting to use the restroom so I calmly, or maybe not so calmly, excused myself back to the line with the girls. By he time I got back, I was hot, flushed, that damn elephant was getting heavier and my hands were slightly tremoring. I sat down and slowed my breathing down and tried to talk myself out of every reason I was having anxiety!  

  • You are perfectly safe here
  • No one can hurt you
  • Your cousin has your back
  • No one will hurt you around your children
  • It’s been 12 years, get over it
  • You are over reacting
  • You have nothing to fear
  • No one is watching you
  • No one can see the fear
  • BE FEARLESS. BECOME FEARLESS. ENJOY YOURSELF. ENJOY YOUR FAMILY.

Well it seemed it to work for the time being. The girls were laughing and taking endless selfies!  They are the cutest!  This was definitely going to be a night to remember and I did NOT want to waste it on any stupid anxiety filling my head with bullshit that doesn’t belong!

Smiles for miles! 


  After a couple of hours, we were able to enter the coliseum for the concert.  The elephant had seemed to be gone and we were well on our way for a night full of fun and music! We were able to secure a spot right up front against the railing of the PIT, which meant only one thing…we were stuck there in those spots until the concert began!  Meadow decided she wasn’t going to drink any water so she wouldn’t have to take a bathroom break and miss anything! I eventually was able to sneak off before the concert for drinks, after making sure to make friends with those around us and knowing they would take care of my girls. 


Once Brett Young came out, the girls were in awe! They were screaming and dancing their hearts out!  As a mom, nothing is sweeter than watching your children with pure joy in their eyes!! He stopped several times in front of us and shook our hands, and one time he grabbed Meadow’s phone and took a video of him singing with us in the background! He made them fangirls for life!! ​


Brett Eldridge was next. Another great performance. They danced and sang, having a blast. Once again, we had a chance to shake hands with him and get lots of pictures and videos!   Being up close and personal was well worth the time and money spent to make it happen for my girls! 


After Brett Eldridge, the crowd in the PIT got a little thicker anticipating the arrival of Luke Bryan. My cousin and her daughter finally made there way back from the acoustic performance, and we were waiting for him to take the stage. While waiting, I started feeling a little nudge of anxiety creep in. I tried to feign it off to the best of my ability.  My eyes started scanning the crowd. I had this overwhelming feeling of being watched.  You know that feeling…the one where you feel it in your gut….eyes staring at you, but you just can’t seem to find the direction in which they are coming from! The “elephant” started getting heavier on my chest. There was a family down at the end of the gate who started shoving into us. It wasn’t long until Meadow and I were feeling squished, along with the two young girls beside us. The elephant got heavier.  I asked Security to please ask them to stop pushing. Nothing was done.

Right before Luke took the stage, Meadow looks at me and says, I’m going to be sick! I looked around at the crowd behind us knowing full well we wouldn’t get through before she was sick. I pointed to the rail and said, just go there! The security officer did NOT look pleased, but I guess he should’ve addressed that family insisting on pushing into the rest of us! Then, she says, “Mom, everything is black!”   Before I could react, she was sliding down to the floor in front of me. She had passed out!  My cousin and I tried helping her up and she jumped up screaming, “I’m fine, I’m fine….I’m NOT leaving!” After two bottles of water, holding her hair up and fanning her, she was back to screaming and dancing!  All was well once again!  

Luke did not disappoint! We had a great time listening to him sing and watching him dance only he way he can do to rile the crowd of screaming girls up!  

But that sinking feeling was there…in the pit of my stomach. I just couldn’t shake it!  Half way through his performance, I had enough. I asked my cousin to leave with me! We went and got the girls some water and sat behind the PIT area and finished listening to the concert. I told her I just couldn’t stop looking through the crowd. My anxiety was through the roof and I just really wanted to get home to my husband and baby girl, safe and sound! 

(This is the image I received after I told him I wanted to come home!😍😍)

We left the concert and made it safely back to the vehicle! Slowly, the elephant, who had been a nuisance all evening, left just as quickly as he came! Left behind was a pounding headache and a painful left ear, which turned out to be an ear infection! 😂😂

The next morning, two things happened. I received a messaged letting me know my ex was at the concert sitting right across from the PIT where we were. Well, I guess I’m not so crazy after all.  The feeling I had was indeed on point! Thanks to my intuition, I really knew before she even told me…I just could pinpoint The Who and where! 

The second thing….my ex texted his daughter to tell her he saw her at the concert, but he didn’t have his cell phone on him to text her the night before! WHAT?? First of all, who in the hell leaves their cell phone at home or in the car at a concert in 2017?  Secondly, you were with your new wife/old mistress, so seriously, try to sell that bullshit Story to someone a little more naive!  I’ve raised a smart girl,  it some little dumbass who will willingly believe you and all of your lies! 

Here’s the part that is the most irritating to me! Since the first week of July….a week after we moved back from Washington, you have not physically laid eyes on our beautiful daughter. She has spent the last 8 months growing up, maturing, changing, blossoming, getting taller, and becoming a young lady.  And you’ve missed it all. By choice!  You’ve missed her first day of High School.  Her first High School football game she cheered at. Her first High School cheer competition, and her first National Cheer Competition.  You missed Thanksgiving and Christmas. You didn’t even call.  And to top it all off, you stood before God, your family & friends, her family & friends, and vowed to love a woman for the rest of your days….as long as you both shall live….WITHOUT our daughter by your side! You prayed for your marriage to be blessed by God. But you….you can’t even have and keep a relationship with your ONLY child? Tell me, how much faith do you think those of us who truly know you, have on your “new” marriage? A marriage that is the result of two people committing adultery on their spouses! A marriage that began leaving out a VERY important part of one of the two of you? 

For two days, you’ve called. You want a relationship now. After 8 long months. After us watching her notice you ignoring her, you finally decide its time to play dad! And why? Because your new wife says so!  She’s noticing you being upset! So now that it’s affecting her, she wants you to contact your daughter!  How convenient. 

Here’s my thoughts on it.  We HAD to move in January 2014 due to my husbands Navy career.  We had NO choice!  We begged you to come and see your daughter! We begged you to participate in her life.  We opened up our home and even offered you a place to stay, just so you could share in her life while we were stationed away from Florida. Instead, we heard all of the excuses you had. 

  • I can’t take time off of work
  • I can’t afford it
  • It’s too far to fly

So we did our best and moved back as soon as we could. We bought land to build a house to insure we were 2 miles away from your house, to make it easier on YOU so you could be closer to your daughter. Now since we’ve been back, we’ve discovered there never was an issue with all the excuses you once gave.  They were all lies.  Let’s take a moment to point out the truth of what’s happened in the last 8 months. 

  • You’ve taken off work for multiple vacations, including a honeymoon 
  • You bought a new house 675,000 (seems kind of expensive to be broke)
  • You took a plane to visit your brother in Oregon. You know, that state RIGHT below WASHINGTON where your daughter resided for 2.5 years!
  • You moved 1 hour 20 minutes away from your daughter…and didn’t bother telling her for 4 months!
  • You got married–without your daughter present–a big, nice wedding
  • You missed all holidays and special events for 8 months….no call, no text. Oh, there was a text here and there…like when we had to evacuate for the hurricane, but not Christmas!

I could keep going but I’ve blogged and blogged about this and it just seriously breaks my heart.  The worst part…he’s made my daughter harden her heart to protect it from being hurt. She came to me after the first call on Sunday and said she thought something was wrong with her. When I asked why she said, “Well, he was crying on the phone and I was looking at myself in the mirror and wondering why I had no emotion about it!” 

And THAT is truly the most heartbreaking part of a dad that chooses to walk away.  She will forever have a wall around her heart, waiting for the ones she loves to walk away!  😢

Little Girl Lost, Or Not

Out of all the things that I’ve done in my life, being a mother is and always will be by far the most important thing I’ve ever done!  Even as a child, I knew I wanted to be a mother.  My dream career choice would change, but being a mother was always top on my list.  I was the youngest of three children, and the only girl, so I would spend hours playing with my babies or Barbies by myself.  I even taught myself how to French Braid hair using my fake babies! I was destined to be a mother! And at 19 years old, I did just that! I gave birth to the first of five beautiful gifts God blessed me with. One boy, then four girls. I am extremely happy with my children, and I have never for one minute been unhappy with my choice of having any of them. My choices of their fathers, on the other hand, I should’ve been more picky…for their sakes! 

While growing up, I met numerous girls that had “boy issues”. Everyone knows “that girl”…the girl who seeks attention from boys, the one who flirts excessively, the one with “daddy issues”, and the one that would jump from guy to guy just looking for someone to love her.  Be honest….you know her….you still know her…or you are her…either way, you know who I’m talking about! From an early age, I always felt sympathy for “her”.  At the time, I didn’t have anything in common with her.  My parents weren’t divorced.  My mom and dad are still happily married to this day and celebrated their 47th wedding Anniversary this past June. Maybe it is my strong mothering instinct, but I always felt bad for “that girl” and would look past her actions and see what was in her heart. If she was a good person, that’s all that mattered to me. I could careless what everyone else thought of her sexual behavior, I knew it was from something deeper, something emotional and had nothing to do with her being a bad person. 

When I had my children, I wanted to provide a stable household for them to grow up in. I didn’t want to have children who had emotional issues that would cause them to act out and be judged harshly by society.  I had a great example of how a man should love a woman. My father was a faithful man. He NEVER strayed during their marriage. In fact, my mothers biggest competition was his weakness for playing softball and coaching! I spent many nights in the bleachers watching the boys play underneath the glare of the field lights. So it’s no shock that my first love was an athlete! My High School sweetheart played football, wrestled, weight lifted and was an amateur boxer.  We were married after school and had our son. I picked a husband and the father of my children based on what I grew up with…my father….a good, strong, loving man! 

But, of course, fate had a different plan. When I lost my husband 2 years later, my world crashed around me. I can’t describe how much pain and anger consumed me.  But as soon as I knew my body held the future child we had created before he passed away, the pain and anger had to be put aside.  My body was a safe place for our unborn child…the grief would have to be dealt with after I had delivered my baby girl 8 months later.  Then and only then did I let the pain and anger consume me and my body.  She was now safe in the outside world. 

I then became “that girl”. Not in the sense of being sexually active with anyone and everyone, but I became very reckless with my choice in men. I no longer chose good, quality men. It took me years of psycho analyzing myself to realize just exactly what I did to myself during those years following the death of my husband. I didn’t think I deserved nor did I think I would ever find another soul mate in this life time! I had it once, and I would never have it again.  My second husband was not a man I could say I ever really loved. He was a very bad man.  I will always be grateful for our beautiful daughter, but he has caused me and my children too much pain to ever say I am thankful to have ever met him.  

Now, my 3rd husband. I did love him. I thought he was a good man. A man that would be a great family man.  He was a Christain, his family was as well. But he turned out to be a “bad boy”.  Why do women chose the bad boy?  I can tell you why…to punish ourselves in some away or another.  Years later, I know why I chose him, but it doesn’t make it easier to accept those reasons when i am dealing with him and parenting our daughter. 

I am open with my girls about being dependent on a man. I’ve tried to make them independent and self sufficient. I guess I can thank my ex for that….In one therapy session he stated I was needy! Bitch, please!!! I was working 6 days a week as a Registered Nurse, making more money than him AND taking care of my kids!! I didn’t NEED him…I WANTED him because he was my husband! I guess he was right in a way,  I NEEDED him to be a faithful, loving, family man!  I guess at was just too much to ask! 

Anyway, the two oldest girls have done very well being strong and independent in spite of the chaos my horrible 2nd and 3rd marriages put our family through.  Both are living in North Carolina and will tell a man where to shove it if they overstep their boundaries! But my 3rd daughter, I’ve been particularly concerned with lately. If you haven’t read my blogs about this particular situation 24 Days Of Silence and It Took 5 Weeks

For a quick recap, we moved back from Washington State on June 26th. On July 3rd, my daughter and her dad got into an argument. July 5th she texted him because he wasn’t answering her calls.  This is the conversation. 

After that, all of her calls and texts were blocked.  There was no contact from her father AT ALL!  He didn’t show up at the games to watch her cheer, call the first day of her freshman year of high school, call to invite her to his wedding in August…nothing…until October 5th. She received a text asking if she was evacuating for the hurricane.  The next text came on October 31st. In one text she questioned him regarding him blocking her.  His response was “I’m not dealing with the drama of you telling me what you are and aren’t going to do”  She sent him a video of her doing her back tuck for the first time on November 2nd and he never responded to her…and he hasn’t since! For anyone who knows anything about tumbling, when you conquer a skill for the first time, it’s a BIG deal! Its the equivalent of hitting a home run or a winning touchdown! It’s been 20 weeks since he has physically laid eyes on his daughter. Why? Because she back talked to him! **GASP**

Hmm…oh, you mean we get to decide when we feel like we want to be parents??  Hot damn….nobody told me!!! Where’s my dang vacation!!! Somebody owes me some fruity alcoholic drinks with an umbrella! And a massage…yea, I want a massage too!  And a pedicure…and a steak, medium rare…oh, crème brûlée too! YES!!  Hell, at this point, I would settle for a teenager that would pick her backpack up off the floor without grunting at me and rolling her eyes OR having to ask her 14 times before she “remembers” what I told her! But that’s what parenting is…but I guess he doesn’t have to do that. When it got hard, he bailed…just like he did on our marriage! Which is why I’ve been SO concerned with her lately! If the man she is supposed to look up to and use as an example for her future relationships turns his back on her so easily, just for being difficult, what kind of man will she choose to be with? Will she be drawn to the bad boy? Will she become “that girl” that everyone whispers about in the hallway. A girl who’s just emotionally lost and misunderstood? 

This weekend my daughter showed me a side of her I’m not sure she even knows exists. It showed me she has the emotional maturity that is lacking in most teens and to be quite honest, emotional maturity her own father lacks as well.  We watch The Bachelorette together as a family. Her sisters watch it as well.  We all had our favorite and from the beginning, Robby Hayes from Jacksonville was one of hers. When he made it to the final two, she was SO upset when JoJo didn’t pick him! Well, we had the opportunity to meet him on Saturday.  He was doing an appearance at a local bar.  My daughter was too young to go inside, but thanks to an awesome friend, he got Robby to come outside to meet her. My sweet fangirl, who is 14, spent 2 hours curling her hair and primping! When Robby walked out of the bar, the look on her face was priceless.  She was in shock. She bear hugged him and smiled from ear to ear! He took pictures with her and my cousins daughter, he even snap chatted her sisters in North Carolina, which literally was the highlight of their night! (I’ve heard the video 1000 since) 😃 He really is just as nice in person as he was on the show.  I admit it, I was a skeptic, but he proved me wrong.  He wasn’t just edited to be a nice guy, he just IS! 

My point of the story is this…out of all the guys on the Bachelorette…all the “hot” guys, guys with abs of steel, model-like guys, smooth talkers, etc…my girl, she chose the NICE guy! She chose the good guy that treated not only his lady with respect, but everyone else as well.  And THAT makes my heart happy! 

Maybe her dad falling off his pedestal isn’t such a bad thing after all.  Instead of leading by example, he’s given her an example of what NOT to look for in a man.  Either way, my girl and her heart will be ok…she’s smart, she’s strong, and she IS needy like her momma as well, but it’s ok….just like her momma, my girl will find her happiness!  

Can’t you see the pure joy all over her face?!? 


My Ex Got Married…Again!

My ex-husband got married today. It’s his 3rd wife.  I suppose I should feel some sort of way, but I just don’t.  At this point it’s almost comical.  And before my critics go on their rant blasting me to God and everyone, YES, I’ve been married four times, BUT I am a widow, a domestic violence survivor, and was lucky enough to make it out of my 3rd marriage from above mentioned adulterous husband with MOST of my self esteem intact!  Thank God for my amazing fourth husband of almost 10 years who continues to lick my battle wounds of relationships past!  So go on critics….speak your lies….try to make yourselves relevant…who gives a crap, my blog is not intended for you anyway! 

So, where was I?  The ex….yea, so he got married….again! (YAWN) If I was a betting woman, I would say this won’t be the last! He will be bored in 2 years and those blue eyes will wander….just a matter of time.  

I gotta give this one props though.  You see, back when we were married, his mistress was SO important to him. He left his family for her.  Almost failed his Engineer test because of her.  He put his job on the line by lying for the stupid bitch. But when push came to shove, the injunction I held against her for stabbing me allowed me also to have our divorce papers include no contact between his mistress and our daughter….EVER!  Well, apparently, mistress number one wasn’t nearly as important to him as she thought she was.  That was the end of their relationship.  I was told he would NEVER give up his child for a woman! 

Fast forward 11 years later.  Mistress number two, who today became wife number 3, must’ve been WAY better than mistress number 1!  The same man who couldn’t imagine giving up his daughter for a woman has now turned his back on his only child! And why? Because parenting is hard.  Because his daughter is holding him accountable for his actions.  Because his daughter threatened the relationship apparently more important than his own flesh and blood! And what was this threat?? The threat of the truth!  He didn’t want his future wife to know the truth. The truth about his past that could change the way she saw him and their relationship. 

Prior to our marriage, my ex told me his father said to him, make sure this is what you want…marriage is a one time thing!!  His father is a man of God….a Deacon in the church. But yet this man has stood up two more times before God and other witnesses and allowed his son to stand before God and his peers and lie! He has stood by and allowed him to speak vows of untruth, and continues to support him time and time again.  And for 6 weeks prior to the wedding today, not one word from the paternal grandparents. My daughter has been cut off from the entire family.  She has been outcast because she had the nerve to speak the truth and hold her father accountable for his actions.  These people that stand before God every week in church and proclaim to be holy! The Devil was once an Angel. Christianity should begin at home.  If you don’t practice true Christianity within your own family, how can you preach it to others within the church walls?? 

So, while I have no emotions regarding the marriage, I do have emotions regarding my daughter.  I can’t change who her family is, I can only help her cope with what she was given.  She is angry, and YES SHE HAS ISSUES THANKS TO THAT FAMILY, but I will do everything in my power to let her know it’s not her fault! It’s his loss, she’s a great kid! She’s extremely bright, sassy, smart-mouthed, hard-headed, stubborn, and relentless…and yes, she gets ALL of that from ME!! BUT, that coldness that she uses to cut those she pissed at, yea, she gets THAT from the paternal side…enjoy it!

24 Days of Silence

It’s been 24 days of silence.  No call, no text, no knock on the door….just silence!  I would like to say I’m surprised. I would like to say I’m shocked at his actions. That would be a lie. I’ve always known how selfish of a man he was and he has finally shown just how deep his selfishness runs through his veins…deep into his cold, black heart! 

Let’s take a moment and play catch up! I’ve been postponing this blog for some time now, hoping beyond all hope this would blow over but it’s not.  So, why not just let the world know how I feel! I have nothing to lose! 

After hearing for the past 2 plus years endless rants about being separated from his child from my ex, my husband was determined to get orders back to the area.  We wanted what was best for our daughter and figured being in close proximity to her dad was important. He managed to snag orders back to the East coast and we were ecstatic! We left Washington state the afternoon of the last day of school to head from West to East coast. Two cars, 3 adults, 3 kids, 3 dogs and 1 U-Haul loaded up and packed in tight, we were happy to be heading home! It took 11 days to get back. As soon as we got into town we made arrangements for my ex to pick up my daughter.  

That same week cheer camp started. Even though technically it was “his” time for the summer and he should’ve been responsible for picking up and dropping her off, that’s not the way it went. Prior to our move, we never went by the final paperwork. By HIS choice, he had never exercised his right for summer visitation, holiday visitation etc. He would more or less call when he wanted her and I would let him have her. He rarely kept her overnight, but would get her after school, do homework, eat dinner and bring her home. It has ALWAYS been my responsibility to take care of the extra curricular activities and making sure she was where she needed to be. Mostly because he doesn’t really like cheerleading, but that’s a whole  other blog!! Anyway, so that week, we co-parented and shared responsibility for taking and picking her up from cheer. It was not a big deal for me to pick her up for him since I was only 5 minutes away.  Everything was going well…we were getting along, everything was fine.  Until…..

My 14 year old daughter comes home from her dad house and tells me his future wife (his mistress from his 2nd marriage) says to her, “I was going to buy you that Chex mix you like, but I wanted to wait to see if you needed it first!” Then she grabs her belly and says, “You’ve put on some weight, haven’t you?” 

Now, any mother should know it took everything in me not to call her immediately to tell her what I thought of her comments to my daughter! My daughter who is 5 foot 9, wears a size ZERO and was barely 14!! Are you kidding me?!??!  Instead, I talked to my daughter calmly about her body image of herself, reiterated the fact that she was indeed NOT fat, and waited until I could calmly talk to the ex before I brought it up. His reply was, he heard her say it and he thought about saying something, but didn’t. So I just said to tell her to not talk about her weight or body anymore because if it happens again, I would be the one having the conversation! Still….at this point, everything was ok. 

July 4th weekend…

He had plans to take her to the race on Saturday with his future wife (&future ex😀), and her  kids. He was supposed to bring her home Sunday so she could do 4th of July with us. It was technically my weekend as he had her last year and we were now following the visitation schedule for holidays instead of splitting the day up like we had in prior years. While waiting for my daughter to come home, I laid down with the baby. I was woken up by my husband telling me something was wrong with my daughter. 

Apparently her dad had decided he wasn’t going to bring her home. So my daughter, being a smart mouthed teenager, starts arguing with him. He then tells her he’s not bringing her home at all! This was after I had received a text saying “come get me” from my daughter, so I sent my 18 year old daughter to pick her up not knowing what was going on!  So the ex proceeds to argue back and forth and she goes outside with her things to wait in her sister. So what does he do? He calls the cops and reports her for being an “unruly teen who’s running away”  By the time my husband got me from the babies bed, I had to call dispatch to see what was going on. They told me the officer would decide whether or not to arrest her when he arrived!! 

Now let me explain something to those who have no idea where we live what would’ve happened.  My daughter, my 14 year old daughter, who’s never been in trouble in school, never been suspended, would’ve/could’ve been arrested and taken to juvenile hall in Jacksonville, where she would’ve remained until Tuesday because it was a holiday weekend. All because she had a smart mouth and said something he didn’t like! 

Luckily, my older daughter arrived before the cops to get her sister.  He tried to threaten her and told her she was 18 now and could be in a lot of trouble if she took her, but she did anyway. He took pictures of her tag and called in a description. I met up with my girls a few minutes later and took them to the safety of our home. 

So…later that evening, my daughter received a text from his future wife telling her how disappointed she was in her! What in the hell???? Seriously….I couldn’t let it go this time. I told her what I thought about everything from her comments to my daughter to the affair she had with him while he was married to his second wife! And I also made sure she knew she wasn’t his first mistress….she wasn’t special….she was just the next in line and she needed a prenup with an infidelity clause!!

The ex kept threatening contempt of court, but I had the papers to prove it was MY weekend per the papers!  Of course he’s to,d everyone I stole her from him and it was HIS weekend, but a little screenshot of the paperwork texted to him stopped the threats. 

The day after,  my ex  blocked my daughter from calling or texting his phone.  She has no way of contacting him unless she happens to knock on his door and he’s at home.  He sold his sob story to his family as well. His mom had plans to go shopping with my daughter a few days later and backed out because “she couldn’t promise she wouldn’t talk about it!” This is a woman who claims to be a Christain woman. A devote Catholic who spends every minute she can involved in church functions.  Her husband is a deacon in the church, but yet it’s been over 2 weeks and not a word from them.  They are SO Christain, but yet are willing to stand before God with a smile on their face and support him as he says his vows for the THIRD time, after cheating on his first two wives!!!  Hypocrisy!  They never hold him accountable for his actions.  The blame was shifted to my daughter…a 14 year old little girl had to take the fall for her dad so he can continue to do what he does.  

And the rest of the family….chirp, chirp, chirp….you guessed it! Nothing. After the initial conversation with the Aunt where she basically sat there and bashed me to my daughter and blamed me for EVERYTHING….from the affair right down to the attack from the slutty mistress….it was ALL my fault!  HE did nothing. HE was the victim.  Oh and his second marriage….you guessed it….same thing….not his fault….all her fault! I guess his penis must’ve accidentally slipped and fell into another woman besides his wife!!! Gotta watch out for the slippery suckers….they will get you in trouble every time! 😂😂😂  And anytime they feel the need to back up their lies with the actual truth, they can march right on down to the court house and pull up a copy of the paperwork for themselves!  It’s better to know the truth before spreading lies all over town!  

In all seriousness, this was a blog I wished I never had to write.  I knew he was a weak man when it came to romantic relationships, but I never dreamed he would be so weak when it came to his parental one.  He handled his parental role much like he’s always handled his romantic relationships….at the first sign of trouble, when things get just a little bit too hard and it’s time to put some work & effort into it, he runs away as fast as he can.  That, my friends, is a sign of a true coward! 

I’m Back!!!

After a long hiatus, I’m back! It’s not that I want to take the time off from writing, trust me when I say there has been plenty of things to write about, but I had no choice! I had shoulder surgery almost 6 weeks ago and up until now, I was unable to reach my keyboard with my left hand without being in a lot of pain! Thanks to physical therapy, I am now able to share all of my thoughts once again! I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not! Ha ha! My blogs weren’t always welcomed from those who found themselves the subject matter of said blog! Oh well! I’m here to speak my mind and write the truth, not to appease others, so to hell with the haters!

It’s been hard staying away from blogging! Over the past few weeks, I had these thoughts that kept swirling around in my head just waiting to find themselves published here. All in good time. I haven’t forgotten what needs to be said. I haven’t forgotten the issues that my family has been through. Trust me, it hasn’t been pretty around here! Some people never change!

Enough of that for now. My sweet husband has been gone now for about 2 weeks! He left me….ha! No, not like left me, left me….but he left me to move to Florida. He had to report mid April which will leave me as a single parent once again until graduation in June. It will be worth it though. We would’ve been the most selfish parents in the world if we would’ve moved our daughter back to Florida at the end of her Senior year! Although it’s a sacrifice being a single parent AND being a single parent dealing with a painful recovery due to shoulder surgery, she is worth it! That’s what being a parent is all about….sacrifice for the sake of our children. Some people need a lesson in sacrifice, but my husband, fortunately, is a pro at it! He misses us terribly and FaceTime is our best friend, but he wouldn’t have it any other way! He will fly back in time for graduation and to move us back across the country! I’m excited for what the future holds for us as a family. I can’t wait to be back to normal again!

More than anything in the world, I’m most excited about being close to our family once again. Being away from our extended family has been difficult. We were so accustomed to having a wonderful support system in Florida. We have made some great friends here, lifelong friends, that will forever be a part of our lives, but I miss my older two kids. I miss my Sunday dinners. I miss our weekends spent together by the pool or cooking out! I just miss being together! Although my oldest daughter will still live 7 hours away, she will still be just a car ride away from us. A weekend trip here and there will be so much better than a once a year flight to Seattle! My kids mean the world to me and to have them all under one roof again, laughing and talking, is a dream come true!

I do have the most beautiful kids ever….I mean, just look at them! Who wouldn’t want to be surrounded by them everyday! 10689495_10153769605935610_8598503142829822116_n[1]

Until next time,

Hugs and kisses to all my readers! My normal bitchy self will be back soon, I promise! Today I just felt a little sentimental! XOXO